Leading up to today, I was expecting it to be one of the saddest, most depressing days of my life. Maybe I'm still in the "denial" stage of grief, but I have to say, today was actually uplifting in many ways. It was -- as a the funeral service bulletin stated -- a true celebration of my dad's life.
The celebration was set to begin at 11 a.m. at the church in Cushing, which as a child seemed so much bigger than it actually is. I guess I was comparing it to the sister church out in the country with its six pews on one side and five on the other. Today, knowing how big our immediate family is and knowing how many people came to visitation, I wondered where everyone would fit.
Somehow, between the overflow area and the balcony, I think only a handful of people had to stand in the back of the church. Those special guests included some friends who drove from Wisconsin Rapids, Waupaca and Madison -- those are 4- to 6-hour trips -- to show their love and support. If I haven't mentioned yet that I am blessed, let me say it now (or again): I am blessed. I also had email messages and cards to give me strength today.
And they did.
While our service was held in a church, we sort of made it a bit non-traditional, taking over a large part of the celebration to share Dad's life story, including two of his favorite songs, "Showers of Blessings" and "Why Me, Lord?"
That was followed by an absolutely wonderful tribute from the grandchildren. All the boys wore suspenders, as Grandpa always did, and all 11 grandchildren and 1 great-grandchild lined up to spell the words LeRoy Hedberg. They each held a letter and told something special about Grandpa related to that letter -- like E is for Entertaining, G was for Genuine, etc. Then three of my nephews played the wooden puppets that my dad used to make "dance" while the rest hummed "Roll Out the Barrel."
While we siblings knew our kids were going to do "something" for the service, how they presented it and what they said was a complete surprise. And we couldn't have been prouder. We know Grandpa was looking down on us all and got a hoot out of that!
Before the sermon and final words from the pastor, we also had a time for sharing special memories. Our initial thought in planning this was that we would let attendees speak if they wished. I hope no one wanted to because they didn't get the chance! Instead, somehow, most of us kids got up to say a few words.
Some of my sisters had typed something up and came prepared. I had no intention of getting up there. I figured I'd be too emotional. But even after bawling through "Why Me, Lord?", I couldn't let the special memories end on a green-and-gold note. So of course I had to defend being a Viking fan and assure everyone my dad still loved me! I honestly don't remember what I said, but I know I didn't cry. Not sure how I or any of us did that, but we muddled through OK.
Afterwards, we got a lot of positive complements about how it was such a nice and personal celebration. We're pretty sure Dad was entertained and will possibly forgive me for bashing the Packers. We'll see.
After the lunch was done and crowd of supporters dispersed, we headed out to the cemetery at our little church in the country. It was Dad's wish that his grandchildren dig the hole to place his urn. Again, they stepped up to the plate and worked as a team, each taking their turns with the shovel and taking pride in their role to give Grandpa a final resting place.
That was emotional to watch but not as emotional as seeing Mom carry the urn and reluctantly, with many tears, set it down and let Dad go. Oh my poor mother! How does one let their other half of almost 64 years go?
She placed a red rose on top of the urn and we took turns with our final, final goodbyes before he was officially buried. Each child and grandchild then placed a flower on top of his gravesite and with some prayers and hugs, we let him rest in peace.
Our afternoon and evening was spent at Mom's (sounds weird not to say Dad AND Mom's) opening cards and reading the wishes of love and support from countless family members and friends. We just couldn't get over how many people expressed their sympathy in one form or another. They all said Dad was such a special guy.
But we knew that, didn't we?
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1 comment:
You did a wonderful job sharing memories. You spoke eloquently and your tribute to your dad was definitely in the mindset of what you've said about LeRoy many times before.
It was a very special service, and it was good to actually meet many of the Hedberg fam. There is no question your dad made a world of difference for many, many people - and he will continue to impact people for generations, as was evident by the wonderful tribute you and your siblings and his grandchildren shared.
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