Emily gave this to me 3 years ago after we completed our joint church confirmation project. I served as her mentor so for 6 weeks we met weekly and went through a faith journey together – including projects, homework, and service work. Oh, and lots of insightful conversations with this sweet girl. We shared many prayers, hugs, and "ah ha" moments realizing the many blessings in our lives.
I learned as much from her as she did from me, I am sure.
Since then, I have been privileged to see her regularly in church, read her hilariously written family Christmas letters, watch her perform in dance recitals and school musicals, plus take dance team photos and her senior portraits. For as much time as I sit at my computer desk, you know I am not exaggerating when I say I think of this "adopted daughter" of mine at least once a day.
And now I can't stop thinking about her.
I learned yesterday after my return from scrap camp that Emily had died earlier in the day. Shocked. Speechless. Heartbroken. I couldn't – and still can't – wrap my head around the fact that this beautiful young lady is gone. My heart breaks for her parents and sister and friends.
How she died is not my story to tell. How she lived, though, should inspire us all.
Tonight there was a candlelight vigil at the high school, where she was mid-stride in her senior year. Hundreds – mostly kids – gathered to pay respects, share a memory, light a candle.
Though hubby and I were too far back in the crowd to hear everything said, I heard enough to know that the same funny, caring girl I have come to know since her childhood is the same beautiful soul as a teenager. The teacher who is in charge of the Mock Trial team shared how Emily was the most motivating and positive student he's ever had. "She brought the team together as no one had and said 'We're doing this. We're winning this." There was much laughter, too, as friends from classes and Drama Club and dance shared special memories.
Memories.
I don't like that word because that means she's gone. And that's all we have.
At the conclusion of the vigil, part of the orchestra and members of the high school choir dedicated songs to Emily. The song For Good from the Wicked musical has always been a favorite. Always makes me cry. And now, always will.
I've heard it said,
That people come into our lives,
For a reason.
Bringing something we must learn.
And we are lead to those,
Who help us most to grow if we let them.
And we help them in return.
Well I don't know if I believe that's true.
But I know I'm who I am today,
Because I knew you.
Like a comet pulled from orbit,
As it passes a sun.
Like a stream that meets a boulder,
Halfway through the wood.
Who can say if I've been changed for the better,
But because I knew you,
I have been changed for good.
It well may be,
That we will never meet again,
In this lifetime.
So let me say before we part,
So much of me,
Is made of what I learned from you.
You'll be with me,
Like a hand print on my heart.
And now whatever way our stories end,
I know you have rewritten mine,
By being my friend.
Like a ship blown from it's mooring,
By a wind off the sea.
Like a sea dropped by a sky bird,
In a distant wood.
Who can say if I've been changed for the better,
But because I knew you
Because I knew you
I have been changed for good.
Because I knew you, my Divine Miss Em, I know a single smile can light up a room more than 100 candles combined. Because I knew you, my sweet girl, I have been changed for good.
God bless you.
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