Monday Mental Health

With so many things occupying my recent days, let alone evenings, I lost touch with a few of my Olympic favorite sports. I knew the "Quad God" had some difficulties that dropped him to a #8 finish instead of a predicted gold medal. 

But I didn't know how much hatred (very negative) feedback he got on social media.

I mean we (holistically) called him a quad GOD, but we didn't mean someone incapable of not being perfect. I mean, that was my opinion.

It immediately reminded me of Simone Biles a few years ago when the mental pressure was too much for her to perform certain acts – even at the Olympics.

But both had to endure so much negativity (via social media mostly) as if they let our country down. So not the case. But people are very emboldened these days to express their opinions and hate on them. 

I saw the video of Ilia doing his final skate at the gala. His redemption skate. I was moved by the emotional actions without knowing the song. But here are the lyrics to Fear by NF. I hope this will open your eyes to mental health issues... just to recognize that people – no matter how famous – are going through struggles you might not understand.

Read them and re-watch his final skate.

Fear by NF
Hello darkness, my old friend (hello)
Knocking at my door again
Beggin' me to come outside
Let you back into my life
Now, usually I'd be strong enough
To lock the doors and keep 'em shut
But not today, I'm desperate (desperate)
So go ahead and come on in
So go ahead and come on in
So go ahead and come on in

OCD is worse than ever, hands are bleedin'
Maybe I should take the pills, don't (whoa)
Know what's goin' on with me
Some days I actually think I might be schizo- (whoa)
Phrenic, prolly not, but even writin' this
Is makin' me begin to spiral, oh, God (oh, oh, oh)

Made a promise, told myself I wouldn't let the fear back in
But then I did, though (whoa)
Told the world that I was sick of runnin'
Then went back to runnin', what a joke (whoa)
Disappointed, yeah, me too
I thought I finally had finally made a breakthrough, guess not (oh, oh, oh)

It's the same song and dance, you've all seen it before
Darkness holds out his hand, then we walk to the floor
Every decision made isn't mine anymore
Like a puppet with strings, I just don't have a choice

What's the truth? What's a lie?
Help me, God, help me, Lord
Face your fears, dry your eyes
Grandma died, what's the point?

Lost the keys, lost my hope, lost my will, lost my joy
Lost a friend, lost my home, lost my faith, lost my voice
Standing back, watching my mansion burn to ash while I
Hold the gas can, asking God if He started this fire
Is this what You wanted? Is this what You wanted?
Make all my hopes and my dreams come to life just to lay them to rest
Is this what You wanted? Is this what You wanted?

Give me a false sense of peace just to show me what peace really is
Is this what You wanted?
On the verge, on the edge
(Is this what You wanted?)
Petrified, scared to death
(Is this what You wanted?)
Prayin' to God, desperate
(Is this what You wanted, what You wanted?)
(Is this what You wanted?)
Hangin' on by a thread
(Is this what You wanted?)
Empty heart, nothin' left
(Is this what You wanted?)
Breakin' down, spiralin'
(Is this what You wanted, what You wanted?)
(Is this what You wanted?)
Standing back (is this what You wanted?)
Watching my mansion (is this what You wanted?)
Burn to ash (is this what You wanted?) While I (oh, oh, oh)
(What You wanted, is this what You wanted?)
Hold the gas (is this what You wanted?) Can
Asking God if (is this what You wanted?)
He started this fire (is this what You wanted, what You wanted?)

I'm praying for all of you who can relate! 💔