Grief: Me, I'm the Mini-Me

We were so saddened to hear that a close family of friends said goodbye to their dad yesterday. Then today, I quickly realized today marks 13 years since my siblings and I said goodbye to our dad. Who I didn't recognize until a few years after his death that I was HIS mini-me.

I do have the obvious traits – not just physical... I always gotta be funny, strike up conversations with strangers, and have an answer for everything (even if it's totally made up but feels correct at the moment)!

I will tell our dear friends that grief doesn't go away – even after this amount of time – but it always hits different. You know you're still fresh off of losing your mom so the biggest jolt of reality is that you are adult orphans – and now you're sort of in charge of keeping the whole family together.

I don't think I've grasped that fully and our mom has been gone 2 years as of last week.

Just cherish all the memories – especially when your dad was in peak health and so full of life and love and laughter and singing to me songs like, "When the red, red robin (Robyn) comes bob-bob-bobbing along!" every time he'd see me.

Jim and I (and sister-in-law Sherry, too) are surrounding you with hugs and love. You're such a special family and I've grateful this non-native outsider has been enveloped into the fold. You are good people. Bless you all in this difficult time, J x 4 + C! 💔

Mom Vibes

Before I get into my blog ... I picked up these unusual and gorgeous roses after work for a friend who's had some rough emotional times over the past several days. If you love them like I do, get to Metro Market in Plover. I don't do endorsements, but I'm just sharing because I couldn't stop staring. So pretty!

I did have flowers on the mind already today because we're closing in on the anniversary death of my mother, who loved flowers – and could keep them alive!

So today I dressed in homage to Mom. Purple shirt (her favorite color) and my "new" floral pants from Goodwill! The crocheted necklace I'm wearing is one I found in her jewelry box while we were cleaning out her apartment. 10-to-1 odds it was something she got at a thrift store or garage sale! Oh, I am my mother's daughter, ha. 

Still, it worked.

(Sorry I took it in a restroom at work. Needed a full-length mirror!)

Two years ago today was a Monday. I had spent the weekend Up North visiting Mom in the hospital and had no idea when she beat me at cards that it would be the last time she'd be the winner. And the last time I'd get an "I love you" and hug goodbye.

She was 100% interactive and alert. 

Three days later, though, when I raced back up there on May 22, she was unresponsive and my "I love you" and hug goodbye were one-sided. She passed away by the time I got back to Wisconsin Rapids that evening.

May and June are tough. Because sandwiched in between Mother's Day and Father's Day are the anniversaries of my parents' deaths. Then throw in Memorial Day. I recently mentioned Dad was quite a patriot and respected the flag so much... and he actually died on a Memorial Day. 

Uff da. 

Just reminds me that Easter, Thanksgiving, and Christmas aren't the only holidays that can hit hard for those who grieve. 

If you're not an adult orphan yet (and lucky you), please don't waste time on grudges or silly misunderstandings that might come between you and your parents. Embrace them, treasure them, and thank them for being there.

So many of us wish we could do the same!

Pre-Merry Christmas

We had sort of an unconventional Christmas Day – for us anyway. Since the boys (and rest of the in-laws) are coming to celebrate tomorrow, today it was just us old folks. 

I decided right away that even though Santa had stockings filled for everyone, we shouldn't have to wait until tomorrow. It's officially Christmas after all! I was thrilled Jim got us a couple's membership to our golf course again. And a gift certificate to one of my favorite locally owned businesses. If I can adhere to some New Year's resolutions, I see some wardrobe changes courtesy of Rustic Redefined. 💗

In addition to missing the boys, but grateful we're just a day away from seeing them, we missed our angels – my mom and dad...

And Jim's mom. But these ornaments always remind us they are close in our thoughts and hearts. We did have dinner at Jim's dad's this evening, so that was nice!

Otherwise, today was also just busy – getting the house ready for company, some food prep, doing a family photo shoot (for hire) and now that I have those two trifle bowls, make them tonight for a customer.

Andes Mint Chocolate Avalanche Trifle (Does Culvers have that trademarked?).

And Peanut Butter and Chocolate Trifle – with both Nutty Buddy bars and various Reese's PB cups. I think she'll be pleased.

And Santa also brought us a Vikings victory today. Yes, we're well aware this win over the Lions helps the Packers, but we're just happy to have this one small Christmas gift with our third- maybe fourth-string QB this season! Pretty sure we'll still be in a good place for the draft! 💜💛

Be Christmas nice and let us have our joy! 😁

Hope all of you had one or many Christmas blessings go celebrate today!!

Non-Trad Holiday Lights

At the end of a pretty busy workday, I was looking forward to seeing some Christmas lights to calm me on the commute home. I did see plenty in Stevens Point, but it was the non-traditional holiday lights that caught my attention.

And yes, caused several moments where I pulled over to the edge of the road and capture them. Enjoy and see God's handiwork – even in the toughest of times for some people...

And 5 minutes later, we're in winter darkness mode. Still, the beauty of a sunset (any time of year) just gives me pause to remember God is huge, my problems/moments of angst are little, and we need to figure out how to take a deep breath and appreciate it.

The "holiday light show" was perfect timing for me. Hope you feel the same!