It's All Relative

It was a weekend on the road seeing family and cousins on both Dad's and Mom's sides of the family tree.

Not all smiles and laughs, but we still found occasion to sneak in a little of each. And hugs. Lots of hugs.

Saturday we headed to the Twin Cities for a celebration of life for my late cousin Dan's son Andrew, who died at age 34 in a motorcycle accident. He served 10 years in the Navy and has two children. Yesterday would've been his 35th birthday.

So tragic!

For context, my dad's brother Ray was Andrew's grandpa. So we had a few Hedberg cousins there obviously for support and sharing. The two love ladies seated are 2 of our 3 remaining aunts. That's all that's left of the OG Hedbergs.

So we treasure any and all time together.

Naturally, since we were in the Metro, we made plans to connect with COOL son No. 1 for COOL treats on such a hot day!

Casey met us at a little ice cream and burger joint called Dream Creamery on Minneapolis' north side.

My kind of place!

We all had ice cream and their homemade Scotcheroo was delightful!

After an all-too brief visit, we headed north to Luck, where we stayed the night at my sister Rachel's place.

Today was my mom's side of the family to get attention. Jim and I met my cousins Laryn and Lydell for a 7:10 a.m. tee time at the Frederic Golf Course just north of Luck.

Early but that was fun. We somehow managed to get 18 holes in by 11 a.m.! That gave us time to get back to Luck to Rachel's and pick her and our potluck food items up and get to Siren for the Johnson family reunion.

This year, in Mom's absence 💔, my siblings and I were the hosts. I sent most of my stuff ahead so it could be there for setup while only 4 of us took part in the morning golf outing. It's a great thing to pair with the reunion!

It was one of our biggest turn-outs (over 50 people) but was due in part that it was combined with a celebration of life (yes 2 in 2 days) for my mom's cousin's son Lamar.

By strange coincidence, two of our high school classmates were there. I say "strange" because last night was our Luck Class of something a long time ago reunion and Raylene and I didn't make it.

So we took a "mini class reunion" picture of our own. Rhonda (left) was there because she's related to Lamar on the non-Johnson side. And Jordan married our cousin so we see him more often than he'd probably like. Ha.

After reunion cleanup, Jim and I got Rachel home and were on the road around 3:30 p.m. Traffic was strangely light compared to Saturday's commute to the Cities. And we were OK with that.

Side note: Temps were warm but tolerable. And same with the air quality – not too bothersome. Thank goodness or some of my family/cousins might not have ventured out.

Hope you all enjoyed a good, safe weekend too!

Grief: Me, I'm the Mini-Me

We were so saddened to hear that a close family of friends said goodbye to their dad yesterday. Then today, I quickly realized today marks 13 years since my siblings and I said goodbye to our dad. Who I didn't recognize until a few years after his death that I was HIS mini-me.

I do have the obvious traits – not just physical... I always gotta be funny, strike up conversations with strangers, and have an answer for everything (even if it's totally made up but feels correct at the moment)!

I will tell our dear friends that grief doesn't go away – even after this amount of time – but it always hits different. You know you're still fresh off of losing your mom so the biggest jolt of reality is that you are adult orphans – and now you're sort of in charge of keeping the whole family together.

I don't think I've grasped that fully and our mom has been gone 2 years as of last week.

Just cherish all the memories – especially when your dad was in peak health and so full of life and love and laughter and singing to me songs like, "When the red, red robin (Robyn) comes bob-bob-bobbing along!" every time he'd see me.

Jim and I (and sister-in-law Sherry, too) are surrounding you with hugs and love. You're such a special family and I've grateful this non-native outsider has been enveloped into the fold. You are good people. Bless you all in this difficult time, J x 4 + C! 💔

Mom Vibes

Before I get into my blog ... I picked up these unusual and gorgeous roses after work for a friend who's had some rough emotional times over the past several days. If you love them like I do, get to Metro Market in Plover. I don't do endorsements, but I'm just sharing because I couldn't stop staring. So pretty!

I did have flowers on the mind already today because we're closing in on the anniversary death of my mother, who loved flowers – and could keep them alive!

So today I dressed in homage to Mom. Purple shirt (her favorite color) and my "new" floral pants from Goodwill! The crocheted necklace I'm wearing is one I found in her jewelry box while we were cleaning out her apartment. 10-to-1 odds it was something she got at a thrift store or garage sale! Oh, I am my mother's daughter, ha. 

Still, it worked.

(Sorry I took it in a restroom at work. Needed a full-length mirror!)

Two years ago today was a Monday. I had spent the weekend Up North visiting Mom in the hospital and had no idea when she beat me at cards that it would be the last time she'd be the winner. And the last time I'd get an "I love you" and hug goodbye.

She was 100% interactive and alert. 

Three days later, though, when I raced back up there on May 22, she was unresponsive and my "I love you" and hug goodbye were one-sided. She passed away by the time I got back to Wisconsin Rapids that evening.

May and June are tough. Because sandwiched in between Mother's Day and Father's Day are the anniversaries of my parents' deaths. Then throw in Memorial Day. I recently mentioned Dad was quite a patriot and respected the flag so much... and he actually died on a Memorial Day. 

Uff da. 

Just reminds me that Easter, Thanksgiving, and Christmas aren't the only holidays that can hit hard for those who grieve. 

If you're not an adult orphan yet (and lucky you), please don't waste time on grudges or silly misunderstandings that might come between you and your parents. Embrace them, treasure them, and thank them for being there.

So many of us wish we could do the same!

Define Precious Cargo

So what defines a "precious cargo"? This weekend meant our neighbors transporting their newborn son home. Yesterday was our son driving his and Mamie's belongings from Dubuque to Duluth for their new start. Today was me and this birthday trifle.

I will say having this tasty bugger strapped in was a good idea since I had to slam my brakes for deer just 5 minutes into my commute! (Side note: It arrived in beautiful status and was 98% snarfed down before I took the bowl home today!)

But what about invisible precious cargo?

Think about who you are carrying around in your hearts – especially those with needs for additional prayers right now.

Like when our son called me tonight and said they quickly traveled from Duluth to southern Wisconsin because his girlfriend's best friend's dad died this morning from pancreatic cancer. His call was partly to share the sad news and also him saying how grateful he is he has both his amazing parents.

Yes, I'm ugly crying now! 

I'll confess, when I was in my 20s, I can't imagine I'd ever have made that call to my parents. So who's more grateful now?

Just think about what precious things you are trying to keep safe. If you need extra prayers, ask for them! And if a friend or loved one needs prayers, share that. 

There's a pretty good group of people around here who will pray and care about your precious cargo!

The Sad Part About the Sandwich Generation

 

No offense to people of younger and even older generations, I don't think you understand the impact of being part of the Sandwich Generation. On the one hand, we're trying to raise our children as responsible adults... while simultaneously attending to our parents' ever-changing needs in advanced adulthood.

Between Jim and I we are down to one parent left. So we've dealt with that a little bit. But I realized today when I heard word one of the ladies at church passed away that I was not ready for the ripple effect.

I forget that when you worship with someone for nearly 30 years that they become part of your circle of people you care about. Just the compassion her and her husband showed each other in church each Sunday was something any couple of any age should aspire to.

And they always appreciated my writing for the church bulletins or monthly newsletters. Bonus points for loving them even more.

This past weekend three of my sisters made the trek to St. Louis to lay our Uncle Charlie to rest. The last OG Hedberg of that generation. So grateful for a trip there a year ago to celebrate his 90th birthday.

But my fellow members of this Sandwich Generation – my cousins there – have to deal with their father's death plus their mother's advancing dementia.

I recognize that certain generations have dealt with insurmountable tasks. but please give grace and understanding with some of us are trying to process as the Sandwich Generation. 

Because many of us are Gen X. I know we can handle it, but thanks for recognizing the challenge and that life is .... gosh darn it, so hard to deal with sometimes!

How to Rebound

You realize that for many of us the best way to rebound from a mostly depressing day is, well, golf. In any form.

So yes, the coveted Masters is on TV. And perhaps I could catch sneak peeks at work on the TV since well, we are a PGA partner so we can have it on our TVs. But I didn't catch everything because well, work!

I loved seeing that Freddie Couples went birdie-birdie to start today. He is a favorite of both hubby and I and we were thrilled to see him at the Ryder Cup a few years back – even as a coach. "There's Freddie!" Love him and his easy swing and easy demeanor.

Not selling his Zen product or anything. Just saying he can keep us all grounded for a spell. Even if he finished well over par.

Getting back into the office today after three days of "remote planning" meetings, it was nice to see most of my team. We even had a birthday and someone else made the trifle knowing I wouldn't make it home until late last night. Yay. I can delegate and it can turn out yummy!

And I know my twin and her family had one heck of a sad day today with the funeral. Thank you to all of you who reached out with words of support. She needs them more than I do. But I love you for caring!

Second Time Around

Today was mama's second birthday in heaven! A couple things occurred to me. First, she looks amazing for a 94-year-old, doesn't she? Second, how can it be almost two years already since we lost her?

As much I loved Dad and dearly miss him, Mom is the one I keep thinking of calling up to tell her about a good pun I heard, brag about my win at BINGO, or suggest we watch Wheel of Fortune over the phone together. And this is every day. 

While talking to a coworker today who lost her mom within weeks of mine, we both commented how this was still our current reality. I said, "Lucky us! Look how blessed we are to have had these relationships!"

There was a time I would never say we're cut from the same cloth. But then I grew up and learned appreciation. And recognized similarities. We both love the clever humor, the correct use of the English language, creative writing, and definitely, as mentioned yesterday, the need to make putzy desserts. 

She'll be proud to see I came home with an empty trifle dish today! Me too if I ever want to look like her in this photo! That gene never hit me.

Cherish your loved ones while they're here! 💖

Pre-Merry Christmas

We had sort of an unconventional Christmas Day – for us anyway. Since the boys (and rest of the in-laws) are coming to celebrate tomorrow, today it was just us old folks. 

I decided right away that even though Santa had stockings filled for everyone, we shouldn't have to wait until tomorrow. It's officially Christmas after all! I was thrilled Jim got us a couple's membership to our golf course again. And a gift certificate to one of my favorite locally owned businesses. If I can adhere to some New Year's resolutions, I see some wardrobe changes courtesy of Rustic Redefined. 💗

In addition to missing the boys, but grateful we're just a day away from seeing them, we missed our angels – my mom and dad...

And Jim's mom. But these ornaments always remind us they are close in our thoughts and hearts. We did have dinner at Jim's dad's this evening, so that was nice!

Otherwise, today was also just busy – getting the house ready for company, some food prep, doing a family photo shoot (for hire) and now that I have those two trifle bowls, make them tonight for a customer.

Andes Mint Chocolate Avalanche Trifle (Does Culvers have that trademarked?).

And Peanut Butter and Chocolate Trifle – with both Nutty Buddy bars and various Reese's PB cups. I think she'll be pleased.

And Santa also brought us a Vikings victory today. Yes, we're well aware this win over the Lions helps the Packers, but we're just happy to have this one small Christmas gift with our third- maybe fourth-string QB this season! Pretty sure we'll still be in a good place for the draft! 💜💛

Be Christmas nice and let us have our joy! 😁

Hope all of you had one or many Christmas blessings go celebrate today!!

The Boys of Summer Meet the Field of Dreams

If there's one thing my father-in-law and his brother Joe loved (besides their wives and kids, that is) it was baseball! Uncle Joe coached baseball for decades. And I have more than a handful of pictures like this where the brothers are at Witter Field to "watch" an Assumption High School baseball game. Surely not there to supervise my hubby and his coaching skills, right?

Today, when I saw Uncle Joe was dressed in that same red Rapids baseball jacket as he lay in his coffin, I lost it. Another boy of summer has moved on to the Field of Dreams.

It was surreal to have almost a repeat of 2 weeks ago when we laid his wife – Aunt Janice – to rest. At her funeral it was nice to see dozens of Austin relatives we hadn't seen for quite some time. Today it was more of a "this is not how we should be getting together again" vibe. Lots of tears.

Still it was a nice service. Jim did the readings again and both he and Clay were pallbearers. Casey drove over from Minneapolis as well (Carter had sleet going on down in Dubuque to prevent his travels).

So after the sad stuff, we were blessed with some smiling time with our big sweetie grandpup Rey – and the humans Casey and Clay too.

I unfortunately had to finish my work day with some meetings. But I could hear three of the four brown-eyed bandits talking and laughing down the hall in the livingroom.

That, my friends, are the moments we need to cherish. Those are the memories that make us one day say, like today, "Remember that time we did this with Uncle Joe..."

I might just have to step and tell November "Move over, Gratitude Month. There are things happening every month that make us grateful."

Hug your loved ones!

Take the Darn Trip!

Not sure how Merriam-Webster defines regret. But I define it as that "was gonna" pain in your heart and low in your gut.

As in, I "was gonna" call that friend. I "was gonna" make time to meet up for coffee. I "was gonna" take a trip to see that friend or family member. But suddenly they're gone. And I didn't. 

I'm here to tell you. Take the damn trip!

This spring, I traveled with three of my sisters down to St. Louis to celebrate Easter and, more importantly, our Uncle Charlie's 90th birthday. Our dad's last living sibling. 

Just a great time with him, Aunt Sally, and our fun-loving cousins. They've lived there for decades and often came "up north" for family events, but I hadn't ever made it down there. So glad I did.

When I heard the news yesterday morning that Uncle Charlie passed away (yes, the same type of news Jim and I have gotten 3 out of the past 4 Tuesday mornings!), my heartache was sadness. Not regret. 

Because I took the trip!

I am sure Grandma Minnie was rejoicing as she welcomed her baby boy to heaven so her family of 9 kids was complete. But on earth, we are facing the end of an era with sadness. We still have 3 amazing aunts married to those crazy but caring Hedberg men, but that's it. The OG Hedbergs on my family tree are gone.

This has become quite the tough and emotional holiday season.

But I am so glad I took the trip. I can say with relief, "I'm so glad I got to see him this year and spend time with him on his birthday."

So if you're thinking about someone you want to re-connect with, visit in person, or just call. Do it. There's no guarantee you can do it tomorrow.

What We Hoped Wouldn't Happen

I have especially felt grief during every holiday season (Easter to Christmas) since my dad died more than a decade ago. And have been more acutely aware of the pain of loss since Mom's passing last year. Simultaneously, one of my sisters has been grieving the loss of her husband on top of that.

I wouldn't wish this on anyone.

But for my cousins-in-law, they got a double blow this holiday season.

Last Tuesday we laid Aunt Janice Austin to rest. And this morning, Uncle Joe closed his eyes and decided to join her. So heartbreaking for their family. These are the "kids" hubby grew up with, spending countless hours at their house being boisterous boys who either played nice or tried to prove who was the most talented with a baseball bat! 

They were like a second set of parents. And nothing hurts more for these boys (and their families) than becoming an "orphan" in 2 weeks' time. 

In peak holiday season.

I pray for all of you who are hurting, missing, grieving someone this holiday season. And well, throughout the year. Focus on the memories. They will reflect the love of your relationship and the blessing that they were part of your life.

Easier said than done. But let's try! 💔 

What We Say vs What We Do

The thing about funerals is we see friends and relatives we haven't seen in forever – most likely since the last funeral – and we always say, "We need to get together for a happy occasion!" But no one organizes it. So we don't. And then it's the next funeral.

I think all families (including my own) are guilty of this.

But I will say it was great today to see dozens of Austins at Aunt Janice's funeral. She'd love the Snoopy popcorn tin above, by the way. 

Jim was a pallbearer and the reader. He does so good. I should marry that man. 💜

Truly, though, it was a very nice mass. I think I've said before that I don't always feel a personal connection at Catholic funeral services vs Lutheran or non-denominational. No offense whatsoever, they may have different delivery rules. But this new priest in town did amazing and told us afterward he will always try to get to know the person, the family, and the memories so he can deliver a personalized message for all those grieving. He did great!

With the combination of the visitation time and lunch, it really was great to catch up with the aunts, uncles and cousins. And heartbreaking at the same time that Jim's mom had her funeral on this exact date 3 years ago. 

The good news, though, is these two Austin wives are laying side by side in the mausoleum -- without their husbands there to supervise. So nobody better sneak in and place a case of Buckhorn Beer between them or there'll be trouble. According to reliable sources today, that is!

After the gathering I finished out my work day from home. And now am off the rest of the week! Time to get a little WICKED!

This evening, I had planned to meet a friend at the show but she found out her daughter had purchased them tickets for later in the weekend. So I just went in. And since I was so early, I caught the 6 p.m. 3-D show by happenstance. Not a fan. It was darker (lightwise not evil wise) and didn't add much to it. So don't pay extra for that if you don't have to.

Still the plot and music was stirring like the Broadway presentation – with quite a few extra cinematic effects obviously. I think I equally loved parts 1 and 2 because you need them both the complete the Broadway story. But if I had to lean toward a better one, I'd say the first. Much more emotion (and humor) as the anti-friendship formed into a friendship. 

Feel blessed that I could see the full production on stage a few times. Now I can just continue to sing the songs to the enjoyment (or annoyance) of the others in the house! Since it's Thanksgiving, I'm not only defying gravity, I am grateful that because I knew you – all my readers, that is – I have been changed for good!

[If you know, you know]

Swinging Through Emotions Like Tarzan

Not gonna lie. There was a lot of stress this week (mostly work-related). But then you realize there are much bigger problems that, by the grace of God, we are not dealing with.

My lunch break today consisted of going to a funeral for a neighbor lady we usually saw a minimum of once a day walking her dog past our house. I was immediately brought to tears when her grieving husband told us "I just loved her so much! Make sure you two hug each other when you get home!" Uff da. Throw in a How Great Thou Art and Josh Groban's You Raise Me Up, and I was emotional toast the rest of the day. 

A while later and channel-surfing hubby finds Tarzan playing on one of the Disney channels. "Little Carter" loved this movie (I'm sure we've seen it 100 times) and had the soundtrack memorized. Plus I've already decided our mother-son dance at his wedding (if he ever gets married) will be Phil Collins' You'll Be In My Heart. So yes, add some more emotion for the mama missing her (now 27) toddler!

How do we cope? Like any Wisconsinite, we head to a Friday Fish Fry!

And witness a gorgeous sunset, too! I can see now that slowing down to 15 mph is still too fast for a crisp photo, but you get the point.

We went to The Ridges and my Haddock Au Gratin was 100% as delicious as it looks! I didn't even need the Ranch to dip my fries in – they tasted amazing dipped into that extra au gratin sauce!

And it wasn't just the food that shifted my mood. We literally ran into about 20 people we know. Lots of people enjoying fish, that's for sure. And great to catch up with a few friends I haven't seen in awhile. Apparently, we gotta get out more!

Have a good weekend, everyone. Hug your loved ones and especially yourself if you need it!

They Just Had to Be Right

When I saw this advisory yesterday, I was hoping that if I just ignored it, it would go away.

It did partially.

Woke up and there wasn't much happening in Wisconsin Rapids. But as I got closer to work in Stevens Point, it was coming down in that annoying slushy way! Darn weather dudes just had to be right!

It was pretty until you had to drive in it. Lunchtime views showed some accumulation. On and off the road.

But yes, pretty when you have a wildlife reserve across the street from work!

Meanwhile hubby texted me a picture of the back yard. Nothing happening. I was OK with that, knowing I'd eventually have a good stretch of road in go-home commute that would be dry!

Beyond the unwelcome weather, today was just a long day. Found out first thing one of Jim's aunts died during the night. Aunt Janice was a spitfire! And I mean that in the nicest way. She loved everything Snoopy and Peanuts and Milwaukee Brewers. Over the years we've traded recipes and Robyn Carr books! She'll be missed.

Hug your loved ones. And be careful out there!

More About The Dash

Our inspirational speaker the other day included the often read-at-funerals poem entitled "The Dash." I'm sure you've all heard it. (If not, Google it.) It’s a poem about the little dash symbol, often seen on funeral pamphlets or on gravestones, between the date of the person’s date of birth and date of their death. When reflecting on a person's entire life, the dash looks quite small. But when reflecting on everything that happened during that dash, it can represent so much.    

For those still living – like us working stiffs in the audience – it’s a reminder how we should focus on how we wish to spend our life. 

And for those still living – and still grieving – it hit hard. I was sitting at the same table as a work friend who just lost his dad last week. I couldn't make eye contact. We were both feeling it.

 

Then today, since the gloomy, rainy weather prohibited any outdoor activity I enjoy, I worked on some stuff for my soon-to-be niece's bridal shower. I needed a foam core poster board for a sign and this is the first thing I pulled out. The picture boards from my mom's funeral.

Uff da. 

Can I ever not tear up? I mean it's been 14+ months but it seems many times like it could've been just last week.

I guess I should look at Momma's dash and learn from it. So much life. Impacting so many. I need to start adding some depth to mine.

But I might need a few tissues before I get started.

The Short Life of Precious Blooms

As I mentioned last night, thanks to recent rain and heat, then more rain and more heat, all the blooms at SentryWorld are in peak condition. And so beautiful. It was amazing. 

As I also mentioned, before we had league, a handful of us took our 4 Marketing interns to the driving range so they would be more comfortable for their upcoming intern scramble. So fun!

But I share this picture because I want you to look at these young faces of 19- and 20-year-olds. This is basically how young two girls in southwest Wisconsin were when they lost their lives in the past few days. Both a 22-year-old from La Crosse (where I went to college) and one from Platteville (where Carter went) had disappeared – and both were found dead today. No causes of death have been confirmed.

As I told my son, I'd just die (probably literally) if that happened at this young stage of life. Let's be honest, any age and any stage if our kids go before us. All of you parents KNOW this! So please pray for the families and friends of Eliotte and Emma, who weren't given a full season of life to bloom.

And think of them – and your current blessings – while you view a few more flowers.

Thank God for the colorful, beautiful people you are blessed to still have in your life today!

Playing Through

It was probably appropriate that the first night of ladies golf league started today, on the one-year anniversary of my mom's death. Because I really needed the distraction!

I actually worked from home today because I had graduation practice this morning (Stop on the X and smile tomorrow!) and figured it would take too much drive time for me to be productive at work. I also predicted that since I did not handle my first Mother's Day well (or not at all) that I'd be a hot mess.

All of this was mostly true.

As I posted this photo today, I said... 365 days without you, Mom. That's 365 moments I've wanted to call you with a funny pun, solve a Wheel of Fortune puzzle together, wanted to play cards with you, wanted to hug you. What I wouldn't give for one on those childhood walks in the woods with you! 

I guess 6 of my 7 siblings got together Up North to honor Mom over dinner. But my one sister was traveling and I didn't get enough notice to travel 4 hours to meet them. 

Again, that's why it's good I had golf league with a friend and we played "against" 2 other friends of mine. They knew my head-space and were supportive. We won't talk about my golf score. There seems to be a pattern of my sucking big time on "Mom" days.

I'm guessing my angel momma is looking over me for far bigger issues! Love and miss you! 💔

Oh, Mother!

 

Upon awakening, I was confident I could get through this first Mother'sDay without my momma. I wore my own "Mother's Necklace" and my mom's "Mother's Ring" to church. 

But I confess. I was sobbing before I left the driveway. So much for being strong! When I got to church, thank goodness my friend Kelly, also experiencing her first Mother's Day without her mom, gave me half her tissues. Because you know, every reading and song (and that dang Mother's Day video) will remind you of Mom!

God, bless my amazing husband for trying to keep me positively occupied all day!

Got home from church and this adorable balloon was floating in the kitchen...

Anchored by these gorgeous flowers! I was going to say Tulips but the last time I called flowers that, this black-thumbed momma was corrected. So let's just call them beautiful.

After asking me yesterday where I wanted to enjoy a Mother's Day brunch, I had a few places in mind. But then, on our drive home, we remember Two Lakes is open on Sundays now. One check to see if today counted and we were on our way.

They had a special Mother's Day menu but all I cared was that they now serve their beyond amazing Coconut Shrimp every day. Happy Mother's Day to me!

Later this afternoon, we ventured over to TriCity for some Mother's Day golf. 

I love that all of us Foxy Mamas could golf. But it didn't take long for me to realize my spirit wasn't in it. Nothing spoils that good walk like bad – or in my case, sad – attitude. We did have some fun. But I was dropping tears more often than I was dropping putts.

A year ago, all 8 of us R's gathered to clean out Mom's apartment since she was actually excited to move into the nursing home part of the hospital in Grantsburg. She was excited to have a roommate, too, after living by herself since Dad died 10+ years earlier. We were happy for her acceptance about moving out of her apartment. And really thought we'd be seeing her in the home for quite some time.

The quick, downward slide of her health after Mother's Day shocked me and devastated me. 

While it officially hasn't been 365 days since Mom's passing, nothing impacts me more than missing her today – Mother's Day. 

My only saving grace really, is that I got to hug the one flesh-and-blood baby that is mine yesterday. 💜

Happy Mother's Day to all of you missing your mom for the first (or many) time. And to you who have kids, wanted children, lost babies, act as an inspiration to a young person, or serve as a mentor to ANYONE. This day belongs to all of us. 

No shame. Embrace the love!