It's All Relative

It was a weekend on the road seeing family and cousins on both Dad's and Mom's sides of the family tree.

Not all smiles and laughs, but we still found occasion to sneak in a little of each. And hugs. Lots of hugs.

Saturday we headed to the Twin Cities for a celebration of life for my late cousin Dan's son Andrew, who died at age 34 in a motorcycle accident. He served 10 years in the Navy and has two children. Yesterday would've been his 35th birthday.

So tragic!

For context, my dad's brother Ray was Andrew's grandpa. So we had a few Hedberg cousins there obviously for support and sharing. The two love ladies seated are 2 of our 3 remaining aunts. That's all that's left of the OG Hedbergs.

So we treasure any and all time together.

Naturally, since we were in the Metro, we made plans to connect with COOL son No. 1 for COOL treats on such a hot day!

Casey met us at a little ice cream and burger joint called Dream Creamery on Minneapolis' north side.

My kind of place!

We all had ice cream and their homemade Scotcheroo was delightful!

After an all-too brief visit, we headed north to Luck, where we stayed the night at my sister Rachel's place.

Today was my mom's side of the family to get attention. Jim and I met my cousins Laryn and Lydell for a 7:10 a.m. tee time at the Frederic Golf Course just north of Luck.

Early but that was fun. We somehow managed to get 18 holes in by 11 a.m.! That gave us time to get back to Luck to Rachel's and pick her and our potluck food items up and get to Siren for the Johnson family reunion.

This year, in Mom's absence 💔, my siblings and I were the hosts. I sent most of my stuff ahead so it could be there for setup while only 4 of us took part in the morning golf outing. It's a great thing to pair with the reunion!

It was one of our biggest turn-outs (over 50 people) but was due in part that it was combined with a celebration of life (yes 2 in 2 days) for my mom's cousin's son Lamar.

By strange coincidence, two of our high school classmates were there. I say "strange" because last night was our Luck Class of something a long time ago reunion and Raylene and I didn't make it.

So we took a "mini class reunion" picture of our own. Rhonda (left) was there because she's related to Lamar on the non-Johnson side. And Jordan married our cousin so we see him more often than he'd probably like. Ha.

After reunion cleanup, Jim and I got Rachel home and were on the road around 3:30 p.m. Traffic was strangely light compared to Saturday's commute to the Cities. And we were OK with that.

Side note: Temps were warm but tolerable. And same with the air quality – not too bothersome. Thank goodness or some of my family/cousins might not have ventured out.

Hope you all enjoyed a good, safe weekend too!

The Full Circle of Life

Today was definitely about navigating the full circle of life. This morning, I attended a baby shower for my co-worker and friend Hannah, who also happens to be daughter of one of hubby's high school classmates. That's how things work these days!

I love seeing the excitement of new moms opening gifts they have no idea may be life-changing... well, at least make the parenting thing go a little more smoothly!

And of course I won a raffle basket because, well, I always win!

I then moved from the beginning of life to the end... When I got home, Jim and I went to the visitation for our friends' dad.

As I mentioned last week, we are so blessed to have the Smits family as a second family to us! They really belong to Jim and his sister, but I'm just along for the ride. 💙 

After getting back from the funeral home, I went to the next lifetime milestone – high school graduation. I was blessed to serve as Ainsley's confirmation mentor at church and take her senior pictures. Turned out to be a pleasant afternoon visiting with her family members and my pastor and her husband. 

Just a weird span of covering so many aspects of life in one day! 

What I liked was the hope associated with a new baby and new life at college. What I appreciated was the sense of peace of losing a father and knowing he is no longer in pain. Thankfully we have God and great friends to get us through all of these!

How to Rebound

You realize that for many of us the best way to rebound from a mostly depressing day is, well, golf. In any form.

So yes, the coveted Masters is on TV. And perhaps I could catch sneak peeks at work on the TV since well, we are a PGA partner so we can have it on our TVs. But I didn't catch everything because well, work!

I loved seeing that Freddie Couples went birdie-birdie to start today. He is a favorite of both hubby and I and we were thrilled to see him at the Ryder Cup a few years back – even as a coach. "There's Freddie!" Love him and his easy swing and easy demeanor.

Not selling his Zen product or anything. Just saying he can keep us all grounded for a spell. Even if he finished well over par.

Getting back into the office today after three days of "remote planning" meetings, it was nice to see most of my team. We even had a birthday and someone else made the trifle knowing I wouldn't make it home until late last night. Yay. I can delegate and it can turn out yummy!

And I know my twin and her family had one heck of a sad day today with the funeral. Thank you to all of you who reached out with words of support. She needs them more than I do. But I love you for caring!

The Boys of Summer Meet the Field of Dreams

If there's one thing my father-in-law and his brother Joe loved (besides their wives and kids, that is) it was baseball! Uncle Joe coached baseball for decades. And I have more than a handful of pictures like this where the brothers are at Witter Field to "watch" an Assumption High School baseball game. Surely not there to supervise my hubby and his coaching skills, right?

Today, when I saw Uncle Joe was dressed in that same red Rapids baseball jacket as he lay in his coffin, I lost it. Another boy of summer has moved on to the Field of Dreams.

It was surreal to have almost a repeat of 2 weeks ago when we laid his wife – Aunt Janice – to rest. At her funeral it was nice to see dozens of Austin relatives we hadn't seen for quite some time. Today it was more of a "this is not how we should be getting together again" vibe. Lots of tears.

Still it was a nice service. Jim did the readings again and both he and Clay were pallbearers. Casey drove over from Minneapolis as well (Carter had sleet going on down in Dubuque to prevent his travels).

So after the sad stuff, we were blessed with some smiling time with our big sweetie grandpup Rey – and the humans Casey and Clay too.

I unfortunately had to finish my work day with some meetings. But I could hear three of the four brown-eyed bandits talking and laughing down the hall in the livingroom.

That, my friends, are the moments we need to cherish. Those are the memories that make us one day say, like today, "Remember that time we did this with Uncle Joe..."

I might just have to step and tell November "Move over, Gratitude Month. There are things happening every month that make us grateful."

Hug your loved ones!

What We Hoped Wouldn't Happen

I have especially felt grief during every holiday season (Easter to Christmas) since my dad died more than a decade ago. And have been more acutely aware of the pain of loss since Mom's passing last year. Simultaneously, one of my sisters has been grieving the loss of her husband on top of that.

I wouldn't wish this on anyone.

But for my cousins-in-law, they got a double blow this holiday season.

Last Tuesday we laid Aunt Janice Austin to rest. And this morning, Uncle Joe closed his eyes and decided to join her. So heartbreaking for their family. These are the "kids" hubby grew up with, spending countless hours at their house being boisterous boys who either played nice or tried to prove who was the most talented with a baseball bat! 

They were like a second set of parents. And nothing hurts more for these boys (and their families) than becoming an "orphan" in 2 weeks' time. 

In peak holiday season.

I pray for all of you who are hurting, missing, grieving someone this holiday season. And well, throughout the year. Focus on the memories. They will reflect the love of your relationship and the blessing that they were part of your life.

Easier said than done. But let's try! 💔 

What We Say vs What We Do

The thing about funerals is we see friends and relatives we haven't seen in forever – most likely since the last funeral – and we always say, "We need to get together for a happy occasion!" But no one organizes it. So we don't. And then it's the next funeral.

I think all families (including my own) are guilty of this.

But I will say it was great today to see dozens of Austins at Aunt Janice's funeral. She'd love the Snoopy popcorn tin above, by the way. 

Jim was a pallbearer and the reader. He does so good. I should marry that man. 💜

Truly, though, it was a very nice mass. I think I've said before that I don't always feel a personal connection at Catholic funeral services vs Lutheran or non-denominational. No offense whatsoever, they may have different delivery rules. But this new priest in town did amazing and told us afterward he will always try to get to know the person, the family, and the memories so he can deliver a personalized message for all those grieving. He did great!

With the combination of the visitation time and lunch, it really was great to catch up with the aunts, uncles and cousins. And heartbreaking at the same time that Jim's mom had her funeral on this exact date 3 years ago. 

The good news, though, is these two Austin wives are laying side by side in the mausoleum -- without their husbands there to supervise. So nobody better sneak in and place a case of Buckhorn Beer between them or there'll be trouble. According to reliable sources today, that is!

After the gathering I finished out my work day from home. And now am off the rest of the week! Time to get a little WICKED!

This evening, I had planned to meet a friend at the show but she found out her daughter had purchased them tickets for later in the weekend. So I just went in. And since I was so early, I caught the 6 p.m. 3-D show by happenstance. Not a fan. It was darker (lightwise not evil wise) and didn't add much to it. So don't pay extra for that if you don't have to.

Still the plot and music was stirring like the Broadway presentation – with quite a few extra cinematic effects obviously. I think I equally loved parts 1 and 2 because you need them both the complete the Broadway story. But if I had to lean toward a better one, I'd say the first. Much more emotion (and humor) as the anti-friendship formed into a friendship. 

Feel blessed that I could see the full production on stage a few times. Now I can just continue to sing the songs to the enjoyment (or annoyance) of the others in the house! Since it's Thanksgiving, I'm not only defying gravity, I am grateful that because I knew you – all my readers, that is – I have been changed for good!

[If you know, you know]

Swinging Through Emotions Like Tarzan

Not gonna lie. There was a lot of stress this week (mostly work-related). But then you realize there are much bigger problems that, by the grace of God, we are not dealing with.

My lunch break today consisted of going to a funeral for a neighbor lady we usually saw a minimum of once a day walking her dog past our house. I was immediately brought to tears when her grieving husband told us "I just loved her so much! Make sure you two hug each other when you get home!" Uff da. Throw in a How Great Thou Art and Josh Groban's You Raise Me Up, and I was emotional toast the rest of the day. 

A while later and channel-surfing hubby finds Tarzan playing on one of the Disney channels. "Little Carter" loved this movie (I'm sure we've seen it 100 times) and had the soundtrack memorized. Plus I've already decided our mother-son dance at his wedding (if he ever gets married) will be Phil Collins' You'll Be In My Heart. So yes, add some more emotion for the mama missing her (now 27) toddler!

How do we cope? Like any Wisconsinite, we head to a Friday Fish Fry!

And witness a gorgeous sunset, too! I can see now that slowing down to 15 mph is still too fast for a crisp photo, but you get the point.

We went to The Ridges and my Haddock Au Gratin was 100% as delicious as it looks! I didn't even need the Ranch to dip my fries in – they tasted amazing dipped into that extra au gratin sauce!

And it wasn't just the food that shifted my mood. We literally ran into about 20 people we know. Lots of people enjoying fish, that's for sure. And great to catch up with a few friends I haven't seen in awhile. Apparently, we gotta get out more!

Have a good weekend, everyone. Hug your loved ones and especially yourself if you need it!

More About The Dash

Our inspirational speaker the other day included the often read-at-funerals poem entitled "The Dash." I'm sure you've all heard it. (If not, Google it.) It’s a poem about the little dash symbol, often seen on funeral pamphlets or on gravestones, between the date of the person’s date of birth and date of their death. When reflecting on a person's entire life, the dash looks quite small. But when reflecting on everything that happened during that dash, it can represent so much.    

For those still living – like us working stiffs in the audience – it’s a reminder how we should focus on how we wish to spend our life. 

And for those still living – and still grieving – it hit hard. I was sitting at the same table as a work friend who just lost his dad last week. I couldn't make eye contact. We were both feeling it.

 

Then today, since the gloomy, rainy weather prohibited any outdoor activity I enjoy, I worked on some stuff for my soon-to-be niece's bridal shower. I needed a foam core poster board for a sign and this is the first thing I pulled out. The picture boards from my mom's funeral.

Uff da. 

Can I ever not tear up? I mean it's been 14+ months but it seems many times like it could've been just last week.

I guess I should look at Momma's dash and learn from it. So much life. Impacting so many. I need to start adding some depth to mine.

But I might need a few tissues before I get started.

In the Blink of an Eye

Pardon any photos that might be too graphic. A year ago today my sister Rachel was on her way to Easter weekend services at church in Minnesota when an approaching car crossed the center line and hit her head-on. 

When fire department personnel and paramedics arrived, it took an hour for them to extract her and her passenger (friend Brian) with the hopes that at least one of them – hopefully both – would survive. Honestly, it was touch and go. The med flight from the accident scene to the Twin Cities included some emergency blood transfusions just to keep Rach alive.

Brian had a fractured pelvis and a shorter, but still painful, hospitalization and recovery. For my sister, there were literally months of time in the ICU at Regions Hospital where we all took turns visiting – and you, my prayer warriors, were with me on those journeys. Thank you!

Three months after the accident, Rachel could finally return home. But it was during that time that my mom had her own home accident and ended up in a nursing home, then hospital, then passed away. We waited until Rachel was able to attend a funeral – months later – and that's where that top photo is from. All of us together – and our wardrobes giving a nod to Mom's love of flowers.

Today, Rachel is not out of the woods. She's fighting an infection from some of her new internal hardware. And, once that's clear, needs to have major surgery on that left leg that didn't heal at the correct angle.

What I've learned from this is that we can never take even the tiniest of moment of our lives for granted. Never take your family, your friends, your job, your health, your home, the air you breathe for granted. Life can change in the blink of an eye!

I also learned that when I reach out to friends and family – even strangers, there is an army of prayer warriors just waiting to support us, whether they've met my sister or not.

We so appreciate all of you for not only praying during the immediate crisis, but continually asking "How is your sister?" It means the world to all of us. And God is definitely listening. 

In turn, I pray none of you have to go through anything remotely as stressful and painful as this. Treasure each minute of each day!

Dirty Snow, Sky's Aglow

If you look closely, the juxtaposition of this photo completely exemplifies January here in Wisconsin. Mother Nature is a good distractor. I was focused on the gorgeous sunset last night but now I see that ugly pile of dirty snow in the foreground at right. 

A picture that says it all!

I didn't get a chance to share last night because I snapped some Lady Royals hoops picture and I as was working on those 'til bedtime. And just remembered I gotta finish those tonight.

But this morning I was blessed with more color at 7 a.m. on my commute. Kind of freaky how it almost looks like a California wildfires-type photo. Thankfully, it was just the sky on fire.

Today our work cafeteria crew celebrated the Lunar New Year and we got fortune cookies. I'm pretty sure mine refers to something like trying a new ice cream flavor rather something silly like a new exercise program. It's almost the end of January. I missed that boat!

After work, we had our Marketing Department Christmas party. We always have it in late January since we're so busy in December prepping for our golf tournament on Maui first week in January. Had some hors d'oeuvres, won a prize, and then headed to Rapids.

Needed to get to a funeral visitation for the mother and mother-in-law of our friends Mike and Christine.

Was glad I was blessed with seeing this gorgeous sunset before arriving. It reminded me God is here and he'll give them comfort. And me, too, since I broke down crying realizing how much I miss my momma, too! 

Got home with enough time to whip together a Peanut Butter and Chocolate Trifle for work tomorrow before choir practice. I can't thank my Martha Steward television crew enough for cleaning up after me as I ran out the door!

I'm thankful hubby feels well enough to go to his golf simulator league tonight. That's a good sign. Prayers for further progress, please!

Be careful out there – of germs and any slippery roads!

London (jet) Bridges Falling Down

It's not often I have to set an alarm to wake up and watch the Vikings. But when I do, it better be worth it. 

And thank-SKOL-ly, today was!

Had to get up early enough to shower and get ready for church before sitting down for the 8:30 a.m. kickoff vs. The Jets in London. It was a great start and it was tough to trade the recliner for a church pew at 9:15 a.m. But witnesses can confirm I did! While I did have my phone on silent during church, I may or may not have been checking the score occasionally. We were kicking butt and I was missing it!

Raced home after to catch the 4th quarter and witness our defense saving our team that seems to be forgetting we play TWO halves. Grr. Thankfully, Aaron Rodgers could not lead his team to comeback victory. He was too close for comfort.

But in the end... we're 5-0, baby!

With an early game, it was the perfect opportunity to take advance of BINGO at Assumption. Didn't win anything but had a good time. 

This was as close as I got to winning the progressive coverall jackpot. Nobody did so that goes up to almost $2,800 in two weeks. It's already on my calendar.

That finished just in time for me to head over the funeral home at 3 p.m. for a visitation for our dear friend Dewey, who lost his battle with cancer last week. Jim was out of town at a Gene Watson concert (you probably have to Google it), so we paid our respects at different times. I found some friends to stand in line with because we have a ton of mutual friends. In fact, so many people, it took me 40 minutes to even get into the building. Obviously, Dewey was a kind, generous, and popular man – who impacted a lot of people in a special way. God, please bless his wonderful wife and family!

When I got home, I had to study a few minutes before heading out to a new type of volunteer work. I was on one of the panels interviewing young ladies (vying for a certain title) so they'd get real life experience answering questions and improving that skill before they face the real deal in a couple weeks. It was very interesting and I had a great time brushing up on those journalistic interview skills of mine! Can't wait to do it again.

For now, I need to brush up on that habit of getting 8 hours of sleep! The wind was so strong today, it blew us way closer to Monday than I was prepared for.

Be careful out there!

Friends and Family Time

What a full and fulfilling couple of days.

I took Friday off just to get some errands done - including waiting in a forever line just save $25 on my oil change. Good thing I shut my car off or I might have gone through $25 worth of gas!

For real fun, I caught part of birthday lunch with my golf partner. I missed the golf part thanks to that stupid long line!

For fake fun, I also vacuumed my car after removing all the golf stuff and photo shoot ladders. I needed the space for some precious cargo to take Up North today.

If you want to know what love looks like, it's something like this. A car filled with 11 raffle baskets for my sister's benefit next month. It worked out conveniently to drop them off at Rachel's today (Side note: She's getting around great with a walker now!!) while we picked her up to go to our Uncle Hartley's funeral. 

On the way there, we stopped at the cemetery to visit what I always called "Dad's grave." It's so weird to think Mom's there now, too. Just hasn't sunk in. 😢

Then it was onto the funeral... The first hard part was that mere days after Uncle Hartley died, his son (and our cousin) Jeff died of cancer. So much loss!

The second hard part was that the funeral was held in the same church in Grantsburg where we just had Mom's service. Just too soon. 😭

The good part, though, was seeing so much family again. Some people I didn't get a chance to talk to at Mom's funeral. And of course, the 8 R's hadn't all been together since Mom's funeral either.

Lots of love and hugs.

Jim and I drove back tonight since we both have church obligations in the morning – he's reading at his and I'm singing at mine. Top photo was our pretty sunset drive home before two detours, darkness, then 90 minutes of intermittent fog on Deer Alley (that whole route from Osseo to Neillsville to Rapids). Grateful to be home safely!

And grateful for special times with people we care about. Hug your loved ones!

Different Kind of Fall Colors

Most of us love the colors of autumn. Of course, the warm hues of maple leaves come to mind first. But today, there were some different colors for me.

First of all, the faded yellow rose each of us 8 kids received at Mom's funeral a month ago. I know it's time to go out with this week's trash. But I'm grateful to feel her presence in my kitchen for a few weeks.

And while I can't keep up with what's happening on the planet, I appreciated this colorful drive home after a photo shoot tonight.

I was definitely confined to the views I could catch on the drive home. 

In fact, when I pulled over to catch this shot, helpful pickup drivers from both directions were concerned if I had car trouble since I had my flashers on. I am quite sure they had no appreciation for my answer that "I just stopped over to take a picture of the ball of fire in the sky."

Their loss, right? I mean, talk about glorious fall colors!

Of course, there was a sliver of a moon making his presence known simultaneously. No offense, Mr. Moon. I just need to soak in the shades of autumn first!

Hope you all got a glimpse of something pretty today!

Weekend Snapshot

I just realized I haven't blogged since Thursday night. I'll give you a hint what's been taking up my time. Yup, 5 photo shoots.

Initially, hubby was going to be out of town on a golf trip so I figured I'd set things up this weekend so I could be free next weekend. Well, they ended up not going. So I still didn't see much of him – thanks to my schedule. 

The good news: 11 senior sessions are done and only 4 more to go! 📸

And some random pictures mixed in...

Like this cute cow / bull guy in the field near my picture taking yesterday.

He really wanted his picture taken – and to reach over the fence to help me take mine. Harmless but slightly pushy. Ha.

This morning I took pictures for our church and our annual God's Work, Our Hands work day – doing everything from cleaning gutters at some elder members' houses to packing up Lutheran World Relief school kits and quilts to painting at local elementary schools. It's always a productive morning of putting faith into action. I'm will to break a sweat, but with two black thumbs, they definitely trust me more with a camera than a set of garden shears!

After that and a senior shoot today, I stopped at our Downtown Grand Affair craft/vendor sale and classic car show. Why would I go there when the Vikings were playing at noon?

Because even though the Packers already played this weekend, the TV idiots decided to air the Bears game here instead! So I know we won. But it sure would've been fun to see our new QB and other new players in action. 

I already lost my fantasy matchup so I'm glad there was something wonder-SKOL happening at least!

This evening we had what feels like the 5th funeral / visitation this week. A friend of ours, just my age, had been battling ALS and then his heart gave out this week. It was unexpected to happen this quickly. Our hearts break for his dear wife and their family. There must have been 400 people gathered for his celebration of life "party" tonight. What a testament to how many lives Rick has touched with his kindness and positive attitude. I could not stop crying. Uff da.

Afterwards, we grabbed a bite to eat at Sportsman's with two of the other couples that were there. We have to treasure time with friends and loved ones when we can! We just don't know.

Let's have an uplifting week. We deserve it! 💕

Sometimes Life Takes a Big Dip

It was cool to capture the Big Dipper in a photo this week, but not so great to deal with some big dips in life.

Today we went to the pre-funeral visitation for our friends' mom. And when I say friends, I mean 5 kids and their spouses plus all those grandkids and great-grandkids. Sending out biggest hugs to the Smits family.

Meanwhile, I learned my second to last uncle on my Dad's side died. And late this evening learned a friend of ours died unexpectedly with heart issues. Oh, Lord. You do not have to do these things in threes!

Not really in the mood for anything uplifting. Just remember to hug your loved ones – even the ones who irritate you now and then – while you got 'em.

Be careful out there – count your blessings!

Those Picture Boards

After talking (well maybe whining a little) about scanning photos and designing the picture boards for Mom's service, I thought I should share what we had on display yesterday. For the main picture boards, I  used my graphic design program to fit them to be printed out as 20- by 30-inch posters. (You can get those printed same day at Walgreens!)

This reflected Mom's growing up years with her parents and three sisters.

This was a representation of Mom and Dad's 63 years of marriage before he passed 11 years ago.

The 8 R's in the early years and then some. Plus at least one fave photo of each of us with Mom.

The treasured grandchildren!

A reflection of some of Mom's creativity and her desire to have fun!

My sister Romey also put together a board displaying some of her many fair ribbons, plus poetry and other writing samples.

We had a framed picture of one those rare moments all 10 of us were smiling at the same time!

And my brother Ron put together a picture book with very nice photos of Mom.

Like I said, I am sure she looked down and was very pleased that we took such care of representing her long and full life!

Goals, right?

P.S. I slept in today and am pretty much exhausted. Physically, mentally, emotionally drained. I'm sure we all are. Olympics are done so this girl is hitting the hay in short order! Have a great week!