Motherhood Blessings

It's a bit early in the day for a blog, but since I couldn't deliver yesterday I felt compelled to write early. Plus, I'm it's not even 5 p.m. and I can't wait to go to bed tonight!

It was a special Mother's Day weekend for a handful of reasons. First, we were headed to a wedding where both our baby boy and his girlfriend were walking down the aisle – just not together. Then there was the fact there was going to be quite the UW-Platteville alumni contingent there – so some of the "boys" we considered our "kids" were there.

So the Readers' Digest condensed version (for those of you who even know what I'm referring to) is this: Carter and his now girlfriend Mamie met while working for Potosi Brewery and Halayna also worked there. They became fast friends. Then Halayna met Mamie's brother Amon the they became ... a fast couple. LOL. So the wedding this weekend was a combo of (Carter's girlfriend's) family and college friends. 

So celebrating the new Redfearns went a little bit like this...

Halayna's little sister wanted to be a REAL bridesmaid, not a junior bridesmaid and she wanted to walk with Carter. Heck, I'd choose him too! Side note: She's a little fireball and pretty much danced all night!

Mamie was one of the two maids of honor – and did a million thing beyond that role including sewing any alterations to anyone's wedding dresses. 

When you see Halayna escorted down the aisle with her big grin, this is her 100%. So when there was a point in the ceremony where they exchanged vows, we weren't surprised at how it played out. The groom did a great job, then Halayna took her turn. 

Then he said into the ceremony microphone something like: "That was so good!"

Then Halayna started giggling – also captured on the microphone – and we all thought "this is so them to a tee!"

During the ceremony, Carter had to hang onto the "flower girls" – their two Corgis. And at the end, those ladies led the way out!

If you couldn't tell by hair flying, it was crazy windy outside. So I guess I take no shame in my hair in this picture with hubby. I was just happy Jim an I coordinated and I coul fit perfectly into my "back up dress" from Casey's wedding 2+ years ago. 

Of course, spending any time of my Mother's Day WEEKEND with my baby makes all the difference in the world! I don't think kids comprehend this like us moms do.

And the kids... oh they just continue to be "matched" so perfectly! What a joy to spend some time with them and for me, selfishly, get to get out on the dance floor with the other "housemate" moms. That was fun. Also great to see and visit with a bunch of Mamie's family who we've come to know over the past 6+ years.

This morning was interesting because it was Mother's Day and I got to see and say goodbye to my baby... but at a hotel. Still, I wouldn't trade any Mother's Day WEEKEND experience with him! That was great!

I've been spoiled for more than a decade with the tradition Jim makes me Eggs Benedict for breakfast on Mother's Day. Pretty much the only day indulge. It took a few towns but on the way from Mineral Point to home, we found the Golden Eagle Cafe (or something) in Barneveld and we stopped and I could indulge in my tradition.

So yum!

When we got home, I hoped the rest of the day would be filled with spring-like thinks like flowers, but it really has been cold and windy. So I'll take my motherhood blessings I've gathered this weekend and run with it!

Hope all my mom friends and those in mother-type roles had the best weekend ever!

Second Time Around

Today was mama's second birthday in heaven! A couple things occurred to me. First, she looks amazing for a 94-year-old, doesn't she? Second, how can it be almost two years already since we lost her?

As much I loved Dad and dearly miss him, Mom is the one I keep thinking of calling up to tell her about a good pun I heard, brag about my win at BINGO, or suggest we watch Wheel of Fortune over the phone together. And this is every day. 

While talking to a coworker today who lost her mom within weeks of mine, we both commented how this was still our current reality. I said, "Lucky us! Look how blessed we are to have had these relationships!"

There was a time I would never say we're cut from the same cloth. But then I grew up and learned appreciation. And recognized similarities. We both love the clever humor, the correct use of the English language, creative writing, and definitely, as mentioned yesterday, the need to make putzy desserts. 

She'll be proud to see I came home with an empty trifle dish today! Me too if I ever want to look like her in this photo! That gene never hit me.

Cherish your loved ones while they're here! 💖

Ice, Ice, Baby!

It's that time of year again when I renew my special relationship with chilling temperatures and Mr. Zamboni. 

Tonight I stayed a little late at work in Stevens Point before heading to Ice Hawks Arena to shoot pictures of the Pacelli Co-op team (which has at least one Assumption member) AND take pictures for Parents Night.

I left after the 2nd period when we were tied 2-2 versus Northland Pines. Only because I had taken 2 periods of action photos, the parent photos, and I had a 30+ minute drive home. 

I do usually get to shoot at least 3 home games in the season. Hope they all are mild weather with a few snowflakes outside and the ice, ice, baby limited to the inside!

Let's go, Cardinals!

Friends and Family Time

What a full and fulfilling couple of days.

I took Friday off just to get some errands done - including waiting in a forever line just save $25 on my oil change. Good thing I shut my car off or I might have gone through $25 worth of gas!

For real fun, I caught part of birthday lunch with my golf partner. I missed the golf part thanks to that stupid long line!

For fake fun, I also vacuumed my car after removing all the golf stuff and photo shoot ladders. I needed the space for some precious cargo to take Up North today.

If you want to know what love looks like, it's something like this. A car filled with 11 raffle baskets for my sister's benefit next month. It worked out conveniently to drop them off at Rachel's today (Side note: She's getting around great with a walker now!!) while we picked her up to go to our Uncle Hartley's funeral. 

On the way there, we stopped at the cemetery to visit what I always called "Dad's grave." It's so weird to think Mom's there now, too. Just hasn't sunk in. 😢

Then it was onto the funeral... The first hard part was that mere days after Uncle Hartley died, his son (and our cousin) Jeff died of cancer. So much loss!

The second hard part was that the funeral was held in the same church in Grantsburg where we just had Mom's service. Just too soon. 😭

The good part, though, was seeing so much family again. Some people I didn't get a chance to talk to at Mom's funeral. And of course, the 8 R's hadn't all been together since Mom's funeral either.

Lots of love and hugs.

Jim and I drove back tonight since we both have church obligations in the morning – he's reading at his and I'm singing at mine. Top photo was our pretty sunset drive home before two detours, darkness, then 90 minutes of intermittent fog on Deer Alley (that whole route from Osseo to Neillsville to Rapids). Grateful to be home safely!

And grateful for special times with people we care about. Hug your loved ones!

A Way-Back Weekend

It was definitely a Saturday and Sunday living in the way-back machine as I finished up my mom's picture boards for her memorial service this Saturday. Finally finished this afternoon! Whew. 

This lovely gem from my parents' 25th wedding anniversary party was left on the cutting room floor, so to speak, but I had to share it. 

As I came home tonight after a senior photo shoot in the high temp-high humidity stratosphere, I was reminded that even after a painful night's sleep wearing curlers, that's still the best my hair (I'm on the left) could do! 

Some non-traditional volume but most getting straighter and flatter by the hour!

What I do love about this picture, though, is the my sister Rachel in the middle is smiling. And today she had another reason to smile. She finally got back to church – in person – after getting in her head-on collision March 30 on her way to Saturday Easter services. Praise the Lord! A walking, er rolling, miracle!

When I wasn't messing with photos, I was of course catching some Olympic action. I especially tuned into today's 100M men's final. Noah Lyles. Wow. But Kenny Bednarek – who hails from east Luck, er Rice Lake, Wisconsin – only finished something like a 100th of a second behind him. He finished 7th, which goes to show you how close that race was. Yay, USA! 

Even though I definitely need a shower before bed, I better tune in to see what else I missed. 

P.S. Thank god for central air!!!

Starting from My Beginnings

When I was visiting Mom yesterday, she mentioned how she hasn't taken time to write her life story yet. I reminded her that I had once video-interviewed her and Dad (in front of my childhood home above) about their childhood – and promised to try to find the DVD of it. Thankfully I found it last night. And this afternoon, I listened to it and "transcribed" it into a Word document. 

The hard part was that Dad's interview was first. I watched just a bit of it and, since I was bawling at seeing him and hearing his voice, fast-forwarded to Mom's segment. I'm definitely going to have to go back to the beginning at some point. Was just thrown aback at having him in the room with me, so to speak. Just miss him so much!!

Since I filmed this 16 years ago, of course Mom looks different than the picture I took yesterday. But her attitude and spirit is still the same. 

Both my parents had pretty tough (aka poor) upbringings. But found reasons to celebrate and find the positives. Both of them said they could see that in their children. Being tough and going after what we want. And taking time to be creative.

And they've both always had a sense of humor we've all latched onto.

She said of her high school years: "My freshman year I got on the Honor Roll every time but one time. That was good. My sophomore year I got on the honor roll only one time. I was dating LeRoy Hedberg then. My mind maybe wasn’t on my books."

Well, duh. I can see how that could be a distraction!

While crying and laughing through this today, I was sad but very grateful how much they sacrificed to make life work! And the attitudes and behaviors they instilled in all 8 R's along the way. Thanks, Mom, Dad, and God for that!

If you've never taken time to interview your parents, do it. I can suggest plenty of questions that won't seem intrusive and at the same time, give you some insight how you reflect who they are!

Our Cup of Coping Mechanisms

I can read Sylvester's mind today. She's thinking, "The kids are gone now. I cried with mommy lady when she said goodbye. They won't be back for almost 3 months. Will licking the remaining mint ice cream in this cup heal my broken heart?"

"I'll just taste a little around the edges and see."

"It's pretty good. I'll dig in and hold onto this brief moment of frozen, minty happiness."

"Hey mommy lady, the ice cream was good... but I'm still sad."

Me too, princess. Me too.

Diamond Jubilee of Sorts

Apparently the symbol of a 60th wedding anniversary is a diamond. We made it work by watching baseball at the baseball diamond – on TV that is – while enjoying dinner with my in-laws.

They'll officially mark their 60 years later this week, but the chicken, mashed potatoes – and cake and ice cream – couldn't wait!

It was a nice to spend time with them and with Jim's sister and her husband. Summer flew by without much family time with all six of us. Probably see more of Jim's parents this week. I mean that cake won't eat itself!

I'm joking. Not because I wouldn't eat it if I could. I'm just going to be out of town. 

Hope you all are spending a relaxing and enjoyable holiday weekend, too. No alarm for this girl tomorrow! Happy Labor Day, indeed.

Under-Booked

We had a very light schedule this weekend so we managed to squeeze in some rest and relaxation – along with fun, of course.

Saturday's rain came after hubby's round of golf at 7:30 a.m. and my Book Club at 9 a.m.  Our only booked events for the day. The rain actually held off until I was working in the back yard. I figured all my reptile friends wouldn't like getting wet so I worked in sprinkling peace. 

Took a shower and nap and after early dinner, the rain was done and the clouds lifted. So Jim went to a Legion baseball game and I headed down to Lake Arrowhead to watch (and photograph) the Shermalot Water Ski Show Team.

They have another entertaining show this year. Try to catch it if you can – most Saturday evenings. Just turn left/south by Hooziel's by the Lake and it's by the Arrowhead dam. (Also, sometimes you get nice sunsets like the one pictured on the way home.)

Of course I took way more pictures than I realized – kind of hard not to – so I was up editing and uploading until almost 2 a.m. I did not set an alarm for church. Just sleep in. But kitty was bellering down the hallway about 8:52 a.m. so I woke up. Church is at 9:30 so I had 15-20 minutes to get ready if I was going to go. I spent 5 minutes in bed deciding because was sooooo tired... but got up, got ready, and made it in time. No speeding, I swear.

Our Vacation Bible School kicks off tonight so the church was all decorated for some desert theme. Do recall what's in the desert? 

That's right. Snakes!

Big ones! My friends setting up for VBS were really hoping I'd show up for church. Uhm, you're welcome. I think? Ha.

After church, Jim and I went to a graduation party out by the river. Sunny day but so windy. We were glad we were not out kayaking. And also OK with not golfing. It would just make me swing harder! So after the party, we went to visit his parents, then came home to watch the end of regular golf and senior golf.

Definitely just winding down. Wondering how soon is too soon for this under-booked but over-tired old lady! 

Out of Hibernation

Guess who's out of hibernation? That's right. Mr. Deck Chair is back! But don't let the picture fool you. It was not as nice as it looked.

But with that wind today, it was definitely cooler than yesterday. Still, plenty of spring weather!

After church today, my walking legs also came out of hibernation. My neighbor and I did the 4-mile hike around Lake Wazeecha for the first time this year. Last year we had mild winter weather and walked much of January. Not so for 2022. But it was a good walk and we had plenty to catch up on – including "when are we going golfing?' All the important stuff.

After the walk, I did my Saturday chores, which I should just say "weekend" since they're rarely done on Saturday. And then dug our Mr. Deck Chair and sat down for a minutes. Not wearing shorts or anything crazy. Just wanted to feel the warmth of the sun on my face.

Later, we visited Jim's parents and then I talked on the phone with my mom. Glad Sunday "visits" are also out of hibernation.

Also glad that we had this nice weekend since spring wants to go back into hibernation – and it'll be another week of un-spring-sportsmanlike weather.

Yawn.

Vacay Expiration Date

Sometimes the best plans come together when there are no plans. And that's why my last day of my much-enjoyed two-week vacation wrapped up nicely.

Wasn't going to do anything, then the neighbor wanted to walk around the lake. I was still enjoying my morning coffee but said yes before I could change my mind. Glad we did because I saw some more wildlife. Of course, I grab for the camera around my neck. It wasn't there like it had been the past 14 days. But I still caught an image with my phone...

These twin fawns were playing around just off the Lake Wazeecha walking path. I haven't seen an albino fawn before – just grownup albino deer – so that was unique. Fraternal twins like my twin and me!

After getting all those steps, I relaxed this afternoon and hung out in the sun for a bit at my neighbor's across the street so we could catch up. That was nice. I was trying to stay away from the computer. Because once I really start looking at vacation pictures, I'll be into it for days!

Late this afternoon, we delivered a meal to hubby's parents and visited with them a bit. Then, on our way to the golf course, Jim's buddy texted him about golfing so we invited him and his wife to join us.

We ladies were pretty rusty, but we had fun so that's what counts. (And yes, did use one "birthday week mulligan" because I could.) It was a terrific way to eek out the last minutes of vacation fun. 

Not looking forward to setting the alarm for the morning. But Mr. Camera probably needs a vacation now!

How Un-Becoming

I love my parents. I can say that now that I'm 50+ and understand what a challenging job it can be – unless you have 8 angels underfoot like they did. Or, maybe it's because I'm becoming more like them. Or just becoming them.

There are two traveling "prizes" that go home at the end of our annual sister weekends. One says, "Mirror, mirror, on the wall, I've become my mother after all." The other says, "Sometimes when I open my mouth, my dad comes out." We obviously fight over the right to take them home because these are awarded after exhibiting positive genetic behaviors. Right?

I am aware of the traits I possess from each of them. But I didn't realize there were more. Until I started seeing these Dr. Rick commercials for a certain insurance company that shall not be named. The character is trying to help these middle-aged couples from acting like their parents. In other words, how to un-become them. He offers laugh-out-loud advice like when you're going to help someone in a store ("You don't work here") or telling them "the waiter doesn't need to know your name." You get the gist.

I have not seen one yet where a woman feels compelled to tell her life story – or some snippet of it – to whomever will listen. You know, friend, neighbor, grocery clerk, perhaps mailman. Oh wait. That woman is me! And possibly my mother.

• Wal-Mart clerk (every time): And how are you doing today?
• Me (every time): Great just getting stuff for my XYZ person, place, event, thing...

That's why I do self-checkout! At their suggestion. I wonder why.

Then today when I see the mail delivery lady pull into the driveway and remember my oven heating element was set to arrive, I don a mask and meet her at the mail truck. She had a big flat box and didn't even get a chance to hand it to me before I regaled her with the interesting tale of how my oven went out while I was baking cookies and other edge-of-your-seat details from my dramatic Sunday. I know she was appreciative because I didn't have to sign for the delivery and she was out the driveway.

I waited until the end of the work day to prove I could install this thing based on viewing one YouTube video and committing it to memory. I had hubby do the heavy lifting and pull the stove out a bit so I could unplug it, but I pretty much handled the rest myself. Just to prove I could. And maybe show I'm right. Maybe like my dad (may he rest in peace).

So yes, in 15 minutes or less, I installed this beauty with absolutely no difficulties. It went exactly like Mr. Video Man said it would. And he did look like "Dr. Rick," by the way.

And there is me and my journey to become my parents. Despite best efforts. And may I apologize retroactively for making you my victims... telling you useless things on a daily basis, for crying out loud, and you didn't even ask for it.

Sorry, not sorry, but you also can't un-become a blog reader! 

Clean Underwear and So On

If you're of a certain age, your mother undoubtedly drilled it in your head to "Wear clean underwear in case you get into an accident!"

When I was very young I wondered how clean underwear could save my life in a head-on collision. Later, I realized it was more a warning not to embarrass myself or tarnish the family name with tarnished undergarments. Heaven forbid they have a hole in them either!

I guess my generation of parenting just said "Wear clean underwear" and left it at that. But maybe I've been a little low on the old-school advice. Today, when Mr. Newly Independent came home for a dental appointment, we suggested he brush his teeth before going. 

"That's like washing your windshield before getting a car wash," he said. Oh, so he's a logical and sarcastic reflection of his parents. Who knew?

Not to be dismissed, I held up my hands and said, "Even I'm wearing fancy nails to go get fingerprinted." Nobody appreciated my fancy nails. But I felt better about myself.

And yes, I got fingerprinted. And yes, it was voluntary. And no, it must not be in the sheriff's deputy's nature to say "nice nails." Though I was all prepared to tell him – or anyone who noticed – that they're my "jail nails." Humor opportunities are lost sometimes in certain environments. I guess in a jail, that's about right.

So I'm not in trouble. Just had to get fingerprinted as part of a background check for some volunteer work with children. Very much appreciate organizations who do that! Since the city PD isn't doing fingerprinting for that – thanks COVID – they recommended someplace in Marshfield or Wausau. Didn't feel like driving so figured I should check with the sheriff's department since we are the county seat. Thankfully, I could get it done for a small fee.

Of course, the magic ink pad they normally use wasn't working so they had to use a real ink pad – heck I could have done it at home then using my stamping supplies. Well the real ink doesn't come off easy so I had black fingertips for a few hours.

But dang, those nails looked good. 

And Mom, I had clean underwear on, just in case.

Seven-Year Ache

Seems strange that this pandemic quarantine business feels like 612 days long already. But 7 years can fly by in a blink of an eye. I miss my dad!

Especially when I see pictures of him from a million years ago (aka when I was a baby). In the photo above, he's having fun with my twin sister while I'm laid across Mom's lap like she needs to spank me. Or, on closer inspection, she might be fixing something for the back of my outfit that she sewed for our baptism. 

Pretty typical Dad is trying to bring levity to the situation! While I thought I inherited that trait solely from him, I also recognize that the quieter, clever humor comes from Mom. It's no wonder we talked for our usual hour on the phone when I called her tonight. We're both so funny we just keep cracking each other up! (Hey, find an audience and capitalize on it!)

OK. Part of that was true. Long conversation, a few laughs, and just a lot of chitchat. She's a sharp cookie for 88! But this quarantine is making her lonely, too. Glad much of my family nearby has been able to pop in for visits – even through masks or window screens or parking lot chats. Thank you!

One thing I learned quickly after losing Dad was appreciating that Mom is still here. I haven't seen her since before Christmas and I miss her. Told her I would hopefully get up there in early June. We both want to see if all the Memorial Day Weekend activities cause a virus spike north of Highway 8. So we'll play it by ear. Hopefully I can just park a lawn chair outside her window and talk.

In the meantime, she's just a phone call away (call your mother, kids!) and Dad, well, he's around everywhere. He wasn't much of a conversationist on the phone when he was alive. But now we have great talks. Maybe it's because I get the last word in now. Who knows? 

Don't know where I get that from, do you, Dad? 

Keep those angels on their toes! Enjoy some heavenly birthday cake and ice cream for me!

Seriously, Wash Your Hands

Been blogging sporadically because it's been a worrisome week. I now know that no matter how old your children get, you worry. I won't say it's just a "mom thing," but it is for this mom!

Mr. College went back to Platteville last week since his winterim class started this week. When I texted him Monday afternoon to see how the first day went (because that's what moms do), I found out he'd been sick all night. And not the good kind. (Not that there really is a good kind.) Of course I was concerned. And he is so far away – thankfully not as far as Germany, where he got sick there a year ago at this time.

The reality is that there really wasn't anything I could do. Then or now. Even if I drove 3 hours down to P-Vegas, I'd still tell him to “rest and hydrate.” So I just checked in often enough not to disturb sleep, but often enough to assure that the symptoms hadn't worsened.

It took until Tuesday to keep food down. And he finally got to class on Wednesday.

Now I know it's a bug that's "going around." Saw a news story this morning out of Green Bay that said a school there closed for the day because of an outbreak of a stomach bug or norovirus. Both students and staff are suffering from the illness and the article said it's extremely contagious.

When I read that the symptoms include vomiting, nausea, diarrhea, stomach cramps, body aches, fatigue, chills and low fever, I was like, "That's what Carter had!" See, the not fun kind.

The sad thing is that even with a flu shot, you can contract this bug. That vaccine addresses the respiratory type of influenza, not the icky stomach stuff.

So even if you got the flu shot, this mom is telling you to cover your nose and mouth when you cough or sneeze, and for crying out loud, wash your hands!


P.S. College Boy reported today he's back to normal. And that's a good thing for this not-so-normal momma to hear.

His Strength is Perfect

His strength is perfect when our strength is gone.
He'll carry us when we can't carry on.
Raised in His power, the weak become strong.
His strength is perfect, His strength is perfect.
      – His Strength is Perfect (Chapman and Salley)

Our hymn of the day spoke to me this morning as I was thinking and praying for this handsome young man.

Remember last Sunday when I was dealing with the shock of Carter's car accident? At that same time, our friends Joe and Michelle were also having a far more serious life-changing moment with their 18-year-old college freshman.

Long story short, Cale went to the ER basically for a wheezing cough. What you might experience with bronchitis or some other virus. Not so in this case. After various X-rays and scans, doctors discovered a mass in Cale's lungs more than 5 inches in circumference. (Think softball.) Then, after a biopsy, they determined it's cancer – thankfully, a treatable Hodgkin's Lymphoma. Since he was in Madison and in the hospital, he already had his first chemo treatment on Thursday. Now he's back home in Wisconsin Rapids. College at UW-Madison and other future plans will have to be put on hold for a bit.

When we say life can change on a dime, this is what we're talking about.

We question why God lets this happen. Why this healthy, active kid gets sick. Why, on the same day my son walks away from a crash without injury does our friends' world come crashing down around them? I know in my head it's not ours to question. But we all do.

Thankfully, part of God's answer is that no matter what happens to us, we don't have to stand strong on our own. His strength begins when ours ends. Even though Cale has a positive attitude about this, if it comes to the point he and his loved ones can't carry on, God will carry them. 

As the song says, God's strength is perfect.

Still... they certainly can use our prayers! It just happens the ribbon color for Hodgkin's Lymphoma awareness is my favorite color. But I'd wear it anyway. It will remind me daily, hourly or as needed to pray for them all. For strength. For comfort. For helpful angels.

If you want to learn more about Cale's story or follow his journey, check out his Caring Bridge site. Again, prayers are always, always, always needed and welcomed! 

Count your blessings and hug your kiddos! 

Morning Glories

I should have realized that the glorious sunrise yesterday was a sign of good things to come. Of course, snapping a photo while driving isn't going to do the magical color scheme justice. But I had to keep my eyes on the road, not the side view.

Turns out is was almost sunset when good news traveled through Wisconsin faster than any speed limit could handle. Jayme Closs was found. And she's still alive.

In our state, I wouldn't be surprised if 8 out of 10 people knew the name and what this 13-year-old girl looked like. Her picture has been plastered everywhere and as often as possible for the 88 days she's been missing. Everyone has been praying for her safe return. And we all know God eventually answer prayers. On His time schedule.

But what a miracle for the girl from a small town in my "back home" neck of the woods!

A miracle yes, but I can't imagine how the trauma of her abduction and the murder of her parents will impact this middle-schooler. So don't stop praying for her!

Although I don't know her or her family or anyone in Barron (which is much closer to Rice Lake and Cumberland than to Luck), I treated it as good news. As any parent would!

It sort of balanced some tough news this week that one of my cousins lost his battle with cancer. I've been praying for him, too. But I knew when I was praying for God to comfort him and relieve his pain, death would pretty much be the answer. But like Jayme's case, there is still more praying to do!

Please pray for my Aunt Barb especially. She lost her husband (my Uncle Ray) this summer and now just 6 months later, she's saying goodbye to her firstborn. The last few days I've almost pleaded with God on her behalf. "That's so much heartbreak for a person. Please wrap your loving arms around her and comfort her! Help her feel our love."

Nothing is in our control. No matter how much we pray, it's still God's will. Just ask him to give strength to those who have to cope with the outcome of that will. That's all we can do.

That and keep our eyes open. Like this beautiful sunrise, miracles happen every day. You don't need to take a picture to prove it happened. The person who needs it will already know.

Empty Nest Commandments

Naturally today's column for our church bulletin is good timing because, well, I planned it that way...

Thou Shalt Call Your Mother

Observe them carefully, for this will show your wisdom and understanding to the nations, who will hear about all these decrees and say, “Surely this great nation is a wise and understanding people.”  –Deuteronomy 4:6

The journey of parenthood is filled with bittersweet moments. So many milestones. So many mixed emotions.

I can still recall sending my son off to his first day of kindergarten. I was proud of him for his newfound independence. And scared at the same time. Will he adjust OK? Who will protect him when I’m not there? All the while, crying tears of sadness because my baby’s growing up too fast!

We wonder if they’ll remember to say “please” and “thank you,” wash their hands, and be kind. Are they old enough to be considered “wise and understanding” people like we read in Deuteronomy?

Trust me. We’ll never think they are. No matter what age. No matter what milestone.

It always astonished me that the same time my teenager was learning to drive I was still checking daily to be sure he’d brushed his teeth. How is he responsible enough to operate a 4,000-pound machine but unable to lift a one-ounce toothbrush? If any of you moms or dads have solved that life mystery, feel free to clue me in.

This weekend marks a major milestone for many parents. College move-in day signals another bittersweet moment. And a pretty big one. Especially if your child is a freshman – and especially if you are suddenly facing an empty nest.

Just like kindergarten, we are proud of their independence and decision to further their education. But we’re really scared. We know it’s a huge adjustment for them – and us. Will they get up in time for class? Will they eat a good breakfast? Will they do their laundry? Will they brush their teeth? Will they call their mother? Will they know how to say “no” to temptations?

That’s a big one. We’ve taught them manners and morals. Will they remember?

If we could just reiterate verse 9: “Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them fade from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them.”

Take heart, empty nesters. As a two-year veteran, I can tell you they get distracted for a bit, but eventually come around. Are they “wise and understanding” people yet? 

Not so much the “call your mom” part, but their teeth are clean.

It's Just a Game

Tomorrow starts the Sectional playoffs for high school baseball. The Assumption Royals have already turned in their uniforms after last week's Regional Championship loss to Pittsville. In the scheme of things, we'll take that loss and be OK with it. It's just a game, right?

Unfortunately, one of the teams playing tomorrow is dealing with a far greater loss.

When the top-ranked Athens and Pittsville teams meet, the mood in the Athens dugout might not be the high-energy excitement you'd expect at this point in the playoffs. I am guessing the players will be a bit subdued but determined. Determined to win the game for their assistant coach, who lost his 15-year-old son this weekend in an ATV accident.

It certainly makes you stop and think. And realize there's more to life than sports. That a game is just a game.

Nothing – absolutely nothing – is more important than our kids. Our parents, our siblings, our loved ones.

Tucker loved sports and was active in several at school. I can't even conceive of the pain his parents are feeling. They wouldn't hesitate to return all of Tucker's previous victories if they could have their son back. Just can't imagine.

If you have a little (or big) ball player in your life, give him or her a hug tonight. Remind them that winning is wonderful, but nothing is as precious as being here to play in the first place.

Then thank God for that.

And pray for the Westfall family.

Unexpected Orphans

It's strange to say, but two of my dearest friends from high school are now orphans.

My friend Gail's dad passed away today, about 10 days after an ATV accident. He was 82 and had been at a hospital in the Twin Cities since the accident. Gail's mom died just a few years ago and her brother just passed away this summer.

Since the time my dad died 4 years ago, my high school BFF Julie has lost both her mom and dad as well.

I feel like the odd man (woman) out with a parent still alive. But oh, so blessed. I called Mom tonight to tell her so.

"Mom, are you going to be around on Saturday? I need to see you. I need to hug you so you know how blessed I feel to still have you."

She loved hearing that. And I meant it. I was tearing up today when I heard the news about Gail's dad, just thinking about how fortunate I am to still have Mom. I can't take that for granted!

Since Julie and I plan to trek up to Luck for the visitation Saturday we will stop in for quick "hello" to Mom. And a hug.

And maybe a piece of pie.

She's on a baking streak this week as she prepares for the church bazaar this weekend. Yes, baking. Like mother, like daughter.

Wouldn't have it any other way.