Glory Days?

Some people have such fond memories of their high school years. They just love to re-live those glory days. Good for them, I say, with just a hint (maybe more) of jealousy.

The talk this weekend inevitably turned to high school dances. This was Saturday afternoon, hours before any tragedy struck, so it was still light-hearted as hubby and his sister recalled the different dances and their different dates for each one. I made some comment about how they managed to remember all those names. And my sister-in-law replies, "Oh I'm sure you remember all the guys you went to dances with in high school." My sad reply, "I don't have any to remember. Fat, geeky Robyn did not have any dates in high school, ever, not until college." End of discussion.

That night, I had a hard time sleeping. I lay there thinking about all those years when I wasn't cool enough to hang out with the town kids, when I wasn't pretty enough or skinny enough for a date (always liking the guy who would never in a million years like me back). I am very fortunate I still have my best friend from high school in my life. But other than that, there is not a whole lot to report in the positive column.

I hate going back there -- back in time and thinking about it. It just gets me down. It weighed heavily on my mind for the rest of the weekend. That's my issue. Me with my struggling self-esteem trying once again to find the positive -- look how good I turned out (ha)!

So you can imagine my surprise today when I get an email out of the blue from a guy I went to high school with. And not just any guy. This was my crush. The real deep, multiple-year crush. Someone way out of my league. But still nice to me.

At first I thought it was a joke -- but quickly realized no one else was inside my high school head this weekend. (Old rejection habits die hard.)

I've only seen this guy at two class reunions and have had no contact with him since graduation. But he found me on the Internet -- wasn't looking for me specifically (probably just fellow graduates) -- but it added a little perk to my day when I got the email that says so and so "added you as a friend" to his network. Hey, it's not a prom date or anything, but that's probably for the best. This time I'd have to reject him since I am unavailable... married to my lifetime crush. I'd probably let him down gently, though, seeing that we're "friends" and all.