Testing our Resolve

Resolution: 1. The quality of being resolute. 2. a. Something that has been resolved. b. A formal statement of a decision voted, as by a legislature. 3. A solving, as of a problem or a puzzle.

Welcome to 2009! I am happy to report I have kept my first resolution and that was to ring in the new year in the arms of the men I love. Yes, men. Both Jim and Carter were at my side for kisses and hugs at midnight.

We actually went out to eat with Jim's sister and brother-in-law while their son entertained Carter at their house. After dinner, we went to a bar, where we shot pool and promptly raised the average age of the patrons upon our arrival. I don't miss that scene. And certainly don't miss coming home smelling like a bar (in other words, smokey). I had to take a shower before I could go to bed!

We made it back to my sister-in-law's by midnight so we all counted down together, then we headed home. I still got up early today so am tired now from all that relaxing. Carter went sledding on the "toboggan run" next door so I got pictures of all the neighborhood kids doing that. With the below-zero windchill, my fingers were freezing in no time so that ended my outdoor adventure for the day. Kids are far more resilient!

I've successfully avoided sitting down at the computer all day because I knew I'd have to start thinking about the dreaded New Year's resolutions. Do I have the resolve for more self-improvement efforts another year?

I wonder why I even mention them out loud. They honestly haven't changed much in decades. Seriously. When have I not resolved to lose weight (insert any number from 10-40 pounds here) and get organized? It's pretty pathetic. And it's not like I don't have the resolve, the drive, the determination. I do, but perhaps just not enough -- for my standards anyway.

To keep it simple this year, maybe I should just have one resolution. I resolve to love myself... to accept myself for who I am and not berate myself for not being something I could never be.

I know you're saying, "What's not to love? Robyn's awesome!" (ha, ha). But I can be really hard on myself. I don't know how many times I cut myself down (especially about my weight) and hubby says, "Hey, quit picking on my wife!" You get the picture.

That says to me that maybe I don't need to change myself so much as I need to look at myself in a different way. For any of you self-esteem challenged folks like me, you know that's a huge step. Huge. Gigantic. But not impossible, right?

That's not to say I can't continue to work on improvements. I will continue to try to eat healthy and exercise often. But in the meantime, I need to love myself for making the effort, focusing on progress rather than perfection.

With our world not at peace and the way the economy is now, people (those expert types) are predicting 2009 to be a pretty tough year. I expect circumstances will test our resolve in more ways than one. So I believe that now, more than ever, a little extra love towards ourselves, our families and our neighbors wouldn't hurt. In fact, I think it will feel kind of good!

I wish the best of luck to those of you with resolutions you are determined to keep. I hope love, health and happiness will form the best of memories for all of us in 2009!